I was late for an appointment, he received a call from my sister said to my son 10 years old, ran away and left a message for me. I took a detour and hurried home. My heart beats very fast. I felt a lot of emotions … guilt, anger, frustration, fear and despair. “Why make things hard for me not? Understand that I’m his father? I do not see that his father is to blame here?” These thoughts and more went through my head.
I finally got home … and thank God my son was again too. I wanted to scold him so bad, but I do not. I accept, said to it again, and warned against the dangers of leaving home, especially for their age.
My heart hurts so bad. I knew that trying to get my attention. I wanted there for him, but I had to work hard to continue to provide him and his brother a year. Then I realized I was alone. I had to do on your own … as the father and mother at once.
This is just one of many painful events happened to me and my children because I separated from my father. And that was just beginning my journey as a single mother of two children … Trip includes many balancing act: the balance between a sense of autonomy and responsibility to raise two children, a balance between telling the truth to my children about their father and hide what may cause them to lose what for his father, the balance between the adoption my wounds and put a brave face, the balance between spending time with my children and the management company and the balance between being a father and mother.
All these years I heard two voices in my mother said, “You’re a teenager and has two sons, who are responsible.” And Lisa Young, says: “You have been deprived of his youth deserve to enjoy life ..” It was a constant struggle between the adolescent in me was to grow too quickly, and my mother, who is his best to be responsible for two children. Lisa adults more I tried to follow the young Lisa in me, the rebellious youth a. However, in his absence, there was always an impact on failure. A clear picture of my kids playing in the spirit again and again, when I slept with a man or a party with friends. I almost went crazy. I wanted to run away, but could not. I felt trapped!
And then, the company itself, looking at all the strong and “ready”. We designed the image of independent women, which is not a man in your life. I was self-sufficient and successful. Married men want to be with me because I represented the type of woman who does not care about commitment in relationships. I was the envy of many married women who wanted the freedom we had.
With all these things that happen in my life at that moment, I still felt empty and lost. Although I do not want to be with a man, I knew that my children need a father … something that will never be able to provide. He also knew that the mother needs more time mentally stable quantity and quality, not just a beautiful place, or buy what they want. I knew I had to do, but I do not know how. I wanted to change, but I did it. In fact, I met a man who treated me very well and got into a relationship with him. He was married to his wife, but distanced from it, so I thought it was good. I tried to create a family with you and your children. It was a fantasy world, because I was not married. In fact, I was still frustrated and uncertain.
God always remember. And when his time came, finally swept me up. After four years, a single mother, I was born. It was a personal encounter with Jesus, who was waiting to happen. I was ripe for it.
I woke up the next day (after being born yesterday), so feel fresh and full of hope. I was ready to start a new life as a single mother. It was just the beginning. Day after day, I drew closer and closer to the lover of my soul. He began to heal and restore me. I lost interest in all except Jesus. I stopped smoking, partying, drinking and sleeping. Nor is it “had”. I just lost interest.
My children have seen a big change in his mother. They took Jesus, and Jesus was sincere in their hearts. I started taking me to church and Bible study and prayer with them at home. They also began to realize that his real father is God the Father, who will leave you nor forsake you.
Never forget the scripture that God spoke so clearly to my day …
For Maker is your husband – the Lord of hosts is his name – and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer, the God of the Earth is called. For the Lord has called you as a woman left, grieved in spirit, and heartsore – even a wife [courted and won] in youth, when he [later] refused and scorned, says your God. At the moment I left, but with great compassion and mercy, and find [Me] again. In the form of less anger I hid my face from thee for a moment, but Enduring Love and kindness and mercy of the old will have mercy on thee, saith the LORD, your Redeemer.
(Isaiah 54:5-8)
God became my husband and the father of my children. I was so happy with her, and even wants to marry someone else. When he was so sure that nobody can take his place in my heart, I sent one in store for me. He knew I was ready for the earthly husband.
I was married to my husband for almost four years two and now our marriage is a testimony of how God heals and restores.
Lisa is a professional writer / consultant with over 10 years of experience speaks Bill of Human Resources and Organizational Development Professional. He runs a professional business writing, including CV writing, business letters, essays, business plans, web content, editing jobs, press kits and other requirements in writing.
In addition to her business, Lisa is also an evangelist / preacher / minister. He has 10 years experience in the service as a priest in a prison for women, leading workshops based on the Bible and Bible study in corporate offices, preaching engagements in churches, police camps, schools and other organizations, information programs for poor families and children, and pastor of the Church. Together with her husband, who runs around towns, cities, states and ultimately to Jesus should go to church, where people are. That led by the Ministry called Gang God’z whose main goal is to reach those who are not reached by traditional means and methods used by the church.